How to Ask for Bereavement Leave: Step-by-Step Guide for Employees

October 14, 2025

The death of a loved one brings immense sadness and emotional turmoil. During this difficult time, it can be challenging to focus on professional responsibilities or make workplace decisions. That’s when bereavement leave becomes essential. It allows employees to take time away from work to grieve, attend funeral services, and support their families.

However, knowing how to ask for bereavement leave can feel uncomfortable, especially when emotions are raw. This article provides a clear and compassionate guide on how to request bereavement leave professionally while ensuring you receive the time you need to heal.

Understanding Bereavement Leave

Bereavement leave, also known as compassionate leave, is a type of time off granted to employees after the death of an immediate family member or loved one. It gives individuals the opportunity to attend funeral services, manage affairs, and cope emotionally.

While the length of bereavement leave can vary from one organization to another, most companies typically allow between three to five days off for immediate family members. Some employers also provide extended or unpaid leave depending on the situation.

Understanding the details of your employer’s policy is the first step before making a formal request.

Step 1: Review Your Company’s Bereavement Policy

Before you reach out to your supervisor or HR department, check your employee handbook or HR portal for details about bereavement leave. Every organization has its own set of rules and eligibility criteria.

Here’s what you should find out:

Who qualifies as an immediate family member (e.g., parents, spouse, children, siblings)
The duration of bereavement leave offered
Whether the leave is paid or unpaid
What documentation might be required
The procedure for submitting your request

Knowing this information will help you communicate clearly and confidently when you ask for bereavement leave.

Step 2: Decide How Much Time You Need

Take a moment to assess your personal and emotional needs. Grief is deeply personal, and the time needed to process it varies for everyone.

You might need a few days to attend the funeral and rest, or perhaps a week to support family members and manage other responsibilities. If you require more time than your company’s policy allows, you can discuss additional unpaid leave or use vacation days.

Being honest about your needs will help your employer accommodate you better.

Step 3: Communicate Promptly and Professionally

When you’re ready, communicate your need for bereavement leave as soon as possible. It’s best to inform your direct supervisor or HR representative both verbally and in writing.

Tips for Communicating:

Be straightforward and respectful.
Mention who passed away (if comfortable).
Specify the dates you plan to be away.
Express gratitude for understanding.

Here’s a sample message you can use:

Subject: Request for Bereavement Leave

Dear [Supervisor’s Name],

I am writing to inform you of the passing of my [relationship, e.g., grandmother]. I would like to request bereavement leave from [start date] to [end date] to attend the funeral and support my family.

Please let me know if you need any documentation or if I should complete any formal procedures. Thank you for your understanding during this time.

Sincerely,
[Your Name]

This format keeps the message professional while acknowledging the emotional nature of your request.

Step 4: Follow Company Procedures

After informing your manager, make sure to follow your organization’s official process for requesting leave. This may involve filling out a form, submitting an HR ticket, or attaching documents like an obituary or death certificate.

Maintaining a record of your request ensures transparency and avoids confusion later on.

Step 5: Plan Work Responsibilities Before You Leave

Even during a difficult time, a little planning can help you return to work with less stress. Before starting your bereavement leave, try to:

Notify colleagues or clients about your absence.
Delegate important tasks to a trusted coworker.
Set an automated out-of-office email response.

For example:

“I am currently on bereavement leave and will return on [date]. For urgent matters, please contact [colleague’s name and email]. Thank you for your understanding.”

This ensures professionalism and allows you to focus on your emotional well-being without worrying about unfinished work.

Step 6: Take Time to Heal

The purpose of bereavement leave is not just to handle practical matters—it’s also about emotional recovery. Losing someone close can affect concentration, motivation, and mental health.

Use this time to rest, grieve, and be with loved ones.
Here are a few self-care tips during bereavement leave:

Allow yourself to cry and express emotions without guilt.
Talk to supportive family members or friends.
Consider grief counseling or support groups if needed.
Avoid rushing back to normal routines before you’re ready.

Remember, taking time to heal isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a step toward recovery.

Step 7: Ease Back into Work

Returning to work after bereavement leave can feel emotionally overwhelming. It’s normal to need some time to adjust. When you return, give yourself grace and patience.

You can:

Catch up on tasks gradually.
Communicate openly if you need flexible hours or a lighter workload.
Let trusted coworkers know you may still be grieving.

If your workplace offers Employee Assistance Programs (EAP), you may also access professional counseling or mental health support.

Step 8: Express Gratitude

Once you’re back at work and settled, it’s courteous to thank your supervisor or HR department for their understanding. A brief note or email expressing appreciation goes a long way.

“Thank you for your kindness and support during my bereavement leave. I truly appreciate your understanding as I took time to be with my family.”

This simple gesture strengthens workplace relationships and demonstrates professionalism even in times of personal hardship.

Conclusion

Knowing how to ask for bereavement leave is important for maintaining professionalism while taking care of your emotional health. By understanding company policies, communicating clearly, and planning responsibly, you can take the time you need to grieve and recover.

Grief is a natural part of life, and bereavement leave ensures you don’t have to face it alone or under unnecessary pressure. Taking that time to heal allows you to return to work with renewed focus, strength, and peace of mind.